


I Want

by MorganaNK



Category: Inspector Lynley - All Media Types, Inspector Lynley Mysteries (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2019-04-30 08:51:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14493309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganaNK/pseuds/MorganaNK
Summary: A little bit of introspection from Barbara, inspired by a post on Pinterest





	I Want

**Author's Note:**

> Property of Elizabeth George and the BBC, no copyright infringement intended

I’d never met someone like you before. I don’t mean the earl thing, or your money, or any of the things about you that would normally get my back up or have me running at the mouth without a second thought and consequences be damned, I mean you, the person behind the titles, behind the money and the fancy facade.

From our initial encounter I knew that there was something different about you. Seeing you at Simon and Deborah’s wedding; the sadness in you reached out to me, screamed at me and touched my very soul. I used every defence in my armoury against you, and yet somehow you still made it through. 

And you stayed; that was a first!

I wanted to hate you. I really wanted to hate you. I didn’t want to care about you or worry about you. I wanted to get through the case and then get the hell away from you. I played my usual role of the angry and sullen bitch to a tee, doing my damnedest to keep you at arm’s length.

I failed. Spectacularly.

By the end of our time in Yorkshire we had formed an uneasy truce. I was glad about that, but you never would have known. I learnt later that you had seen something in me too, something that had caught your interest just as you had caught mine, but we kept our own counsel, too damaged to open ourselves up to the possibility of yet more pain.

As time and cases passed the bond between us grew stronger. We couldn’t put a name to it or explain it to other people even if we wanted to, which we didn’t, but we grew to rely on it, and on each other. What we shared became as essential to us as air and water.

Working with you, being friends with you, sharing whatever it is we share, it’s changed me, and I think it’s changed you too. We’ve been through a lot, things that would break most people, things that came close to breaking us.

We didn’t let them.

Years ago, if you’d asked me what I wanted out of life, I would have come out with the same old shit that everyone else does; money, health, happiness and, if I were lucky, love. Since I met you, those things mean nothing. Now I only want two things in this world. 

I want you, and I want us.


End file.
